A technicolor loony.

Letter Meme.

I asked and jenny_junipurr gave me the choice between J or H. Since one is supposed to do ten things the letter makes one think of, I'm going to do five of J and five of H, 'cause that's just how I am.

Too bad one of the letters isn't D, 'cause I've just realized that I tend to use "Dude!" in my head, a *lot*. Or maybe re-realized, but it all works out to the same thing.

Jeff: My SO, one of the people who knows me best, this guy that just took me by surprise and loves me with all his heart. And lets me love him with all of mine. He gives me the freedom to be myself and lets me know (in word and deed) that he won't stop loving me for growing and changing. He lets me take care of him and takes care of me in so many ways I can't count them all, let alone list them. And he's one of the few people I can be dumb in front of without feeling humiliated. (That's an internal thing...nobody in my current life would make me feel bad for not knowing something). He's nifty and fun and I'm just lucky.

*Edited 'cause I misspelled Dumb. Too funny*

Ju-ju bees (is that supposed to be just one word?): My Boompa liked these, along with Circus Peanuts, Orange Slices, licorice and jelly beans. They make me think of him, which makes me smile. He was a swell fella.

Judge: I used to want to be one. I wanted to be a lawyer first (specializing in family law) and then a judge. It was a fond dream for a number of years. But I realized that the main reason I would get into it would be to put abusers away for a very long time. Which *isn't* a bad reason at all...but I don't know how many defeats I'd be able to deal with. So, not doin' it. I'll probably take some law classes though, 'cause I still love the law, even if it isn't going to be a career.

Journaling: Something I've done, in multiple forms, for the majority of my life. Writing it down helps me remember. Even the parts I don't necessarily want to remember, but should. Maybe *especially* those parts. And, having journaled for so long, I can track my habits, especially wrt romantic relationships. So, now that I'm equipped with all that data, I can screw up in new and more interesting ways.

Joking: One of the ways I interact with the world and deal with things. In many situations, one can laugh or one can cry. Laughing is more fun. And, can sometimes be *as* cathartic as crying.

That was more challenging than expected. Let's see if H is more or less challenging.

Hula-hoop: Something I've never been able to do. (Hula Hoop became a verb very quickly, didn't it?) I've tried my best, but have finally given it up as hopeless. I did try to get my dog, Brooklyn, to jump through one. But he was a small dog, so I started with it on the ground. He'd give me a look and then wander through. Never did *jump*. (As my Nana used to say "He knows you're making him pass like a fool.")

Home: Somewhere I looked for, for a *very* long time. I love it here. This is my home. I don't expect to spend all my remaining years here, but I like it here *very* much and am content to live here till we move to California. (which is where I want to end up. Absolutely no idea when though.)

Hope: When thinking something *might* happen is too scary or makes me think I'm tempting fate, I hope. Fervently.

I like hope. It's almost a wish, not quite a prayer. Very humble, but clear. And even if one doesn't get the thing one was hoping for, I think the hoping does one good.

Here: as in "Being here, now". I have often made the mistake of looking forward to something and either putting things off till that thing happens or thinking that thing will make things better. (whatever things happen to be). It's great to look forward to things, but using them as an excuse to not live life to the fullest is very not good. I think I'm going a passable to good job of calming myself down and saying "Yes, {thingie} will be marvelous, but we've got everything set up for that. Let's see what we can do with the *rest* of the time, okay?" (Yeah. That's one of the ways I speak to myself inside my head. Weird thing is, if anyone else spoke to me like that, I'd be quite cranky. I guess it's 'cause I know my motivations. *grin*)

Happiness: What I'd like, for me and those I care about.

It turned out to be pretty much *as* difficult as J. :)

'Night, y'all. Hope your weekends are good to you.